What the hell am I saying here?

It’s hard for me to comprehend as well, probably because, as a person who has suffered from infant separation, I’m at a significant disadvantage.

Let me first explain a few things.

Universal consciousness

Universal consciousness is a state of awareness in which the individual consciousness becomes one with the universe. Universal consciousness is sometimes called the universal mind, especially in non-yoga contexts. It is what connects all existence. In yoga, it is the true Self, which transcends space and time.

Spiritual Awakening

Spiritual Awakening is a simultaneous increase of Expanding Consciousness that occurs when our spiritual-energetic bodies connect into our physical bodies. Enlightenment is the “full comprehension of a situation”. In the Western world, the concept of enlightenment in a religious context acquired a romantic meaning. It has become synonymous with self-realisation and the true self, which is regarded as a substantial essence that can be corrupted by social conditioning.

The Illusion of Separation

Candace van Dell (Spiritual Coach, Author, Speaker) – Contributor for Huffpost suggests “The illusion of separation is what continues to keep us away from our authentic self. We see others as more powerful or less worthy but it is all just a mirror of our need to maintain the false self. I became free of the illusion when I reclaimed those parts of myself I left behind as a little girl. This was never anything broken that needed to be fixed, just something hurting that needed to be healed. The belief in lack, as well as the belief in grandeur, are what keep us in the illusion of being separate from others and reflect the separation we have feared within ourselves.”

From an article by EP McKnight, MEd (actress and writer) – How the Virtual Play is the New Way for the New Day

Social isolation breeds separation but not virtually. Staying connected is paramount because we are all in this together. There are many ways of staying together and being in touch without being in the same space or the same proximity as another. Many are seeking ways to stay in touch with families, friends and business-wise globally.

Being socially isolated doesn’t mean you can not connect with others, just that a new way of connecting is more readily available. Many of these ways to connect are right at your fingertips.

From a spiritual and social standpoint, they’re both partially incorrect and here’s why…

Infant Separation

A sudden and lasting separation from a parent can permanently alter brain development and structure. So to say that there was “never anything broken” does not apply. At birth, the brain is the most underdeveloped organ in our body. It takes up until our mid-20s for our brains to fully mature. Any serious and prolonged adversity, such as a sudden, unexpected and lasting separation from a caretaker is extremely bad, and unexpected and lasting separation from the inherent connection to a biological mother is 100 per cent catastrophic. One changes the structure of the developing brain over a short space of time. The other changes the structure of the developing brain, breaking it instantaneously. Separation damages a child’s ability to process emotion and leaves scars that are profound and lifelong. If these issues are left untreated or ignored the issues and related traumas multiply and increase in intensity.

Bessel van der Kolk pointed this out in his book “The Body Keeps the Score” it seems so obvious; mothers and the primary caregivers around a child are the sources of safety and security in the normal course of events.

“Being able to feel safe with other people is probably the most important aspect of mental health; safe connections are fundamental to meaningful and satisfying lives.” 

Bessel van der Kolk 

Take adoption, for example, the current most prominent social narrative believes that a child does not remember anything, yes this may be true however their bodies remember EVERYTHING! It just doesn’t end there, we have to ask how does this play out? As an adoptee separation breeds isolation, saying we are all in this together is a falsehood. Yes, I may be taking EP McKnight out of context however the reality is that in the era of covid, adoptees have had to deal with isolation and separation for multiple decades or more, rather than multiple years without acknowledgement of their true experience while being gaslit by society.

Adoption is the legal enforcement of social distancing from kin for life.

It seems like any time adoptees want to know their first family or learn about the birth culture they came from, it can turn into a sense of betrayal. Like They’re supposed to choose between this life that they were born into and the life they were adopted into on top of dealing with the ongoing effects and trauma of separation. This severing is so abrupt that the adoptee loses all sense of who they are, who they were meant to be and who they were supposed to be without any prior recognition or reference. Many seeking to connect are completely lost. Lost in their identity, lost in their trauma and lost in their ability to assimilate into society.

Adoptees can literally write the bible about separation. If adoption truly existed for the best interest of the child, money would not be involved, secrecy would never be encouraged, identities would never be changed, records would never be sealed, reunification would always be first priority and society would listen to those who are most affected, adoptees.

In all this, adoptees simply aren’t given the space, understanding or support to fully come to terms with what has happened to them. Before you say “but way about …” The standard orphan argument just doesn’t stack up. Reuters notes a statistic that “An estimated 8 million children live in orphanages and other institutions worldwide, but 80 per cent are not orphans”. Also, history is full of failed horrific social experiments of witch babies are separated from their heritage through illegal adoptions and in some cases killed. For example:

Bon Secours Mother and Baby Home

Canadian First Nation Sixties Scoop

Forced adoption – UK & Australia

Oranga Tamariki Baby Uplifts – New Zealand

Tennessee Children’s Home Society – USA

Just to name a few, many other countries such as India, Russia, Spain, the EU & parts of Asia also participate in similar ways. There are still residual social mechanisms at play that focus on the continuation of separation for the benefit of fulfilling eogic needs rather than focusing on assisting people in need to find and come to peace with their truth. It’s obvious there is a worldwide denial of the hidden war against mother and child.

“The abuse and subjugation of women and girls is the most pervasive and unaddressed human rights violation on Earth.”

Former US President Jimmy Carter


Perennialism is a perspective within the philosophy of religion that views each of the world’s religious traditions as sharing a single, universal truth on which foundation all religious knowledge and doctrine have grown. According to this view, each world religion, including but not limited to Christianity, Islam, Judaism, Hinduism, Taoism, Confucianism, Shinto, Sikhism, and Buddhism, is an interpretation of this universal truth adapted to cater for the psychological, intellectual, and social needs of a given culture of a given period of history.

Ascension & Enlightenment

“People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own soul. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”

Carl Jung

Ascension or enlightenment is typically known as the dissolution of the ego. Ego death is the full understanding and letting go of all addictions, attachments and bonds in this life. Adoption creates various embedded attachment issues immediately from birth. The classic “Seven Core Issues in Adoption,” published in the early 1980s, outlined the seven lifelong issues experienced by all members of the adoption triad: loss, rejection, guilt and shame, grief, identity, intimacy, and mastery/control.

For an adoptee to achieve enlightenment they must deal with the karma offloaded on to them from their biological family and face their own personal diaspora. This makes it virtually impossible to active equanimity because they are mentally, emotionally and socially stuck in a perpetual state of fight or flight.

How are adoptees supposed to face their imposed karma and process trauma while being expected to perpetuate a lie in order to keep others happy?

As far as the question… “Is separation an illusion from the eyes of an infant facing trauma?” The answer. No!

Trauma can seriously disrupt important aspects of development and connection leaving the child so shocked and frozen that it’s almost impossible to recover. Adoptees have no reference to a previously experienced “Normal State”. They face THE MOST horrendous experience an infant could ever experience Immediately at birth freezing them in their developmental tracks, shattering their “reality” forever. Awakening only comes after their world falls apart yet again years later IF they question what has happened to them in order to heal. During this time it’s extremely common for the very people tasked with looking after them to abandon them because they just don’t want to hear it. Ultimately creating a new reality they simply can’t continue to live in.

Can you imagine trying to resolve that?


The Stewardship Model offers a safe warm, loving support family with “CONTINUITY” in relationships for a lifetime.

Stewardship respects a child’s identity. The stewardship model supports family contact and arbitrates for it and does not rely on the goodwill of the parties involved. The Stewardship family does not try to replace the child’s family. The stewardship model does not change the child’s true Identity. A stewardship model does not cancel the child’s Original Birth Certificate. A stewardship model does not produce a new Birth Certificate that states non-biological people gave birth to them. A stewardship model offers a lifelong warm and loving supportive family that does not try to graft the child onto a genetic stranger’s family tree. A stewardship model does not change the child’s name. A stewardship model would introduce Welfare checks to be carried out on all care for children in private homes.

More information here

Adoptees require complete understanding, time, more time, and a safe space to fully process their trauma, be it in an understanding family, or in society in general, preferably both. Anything less is psychosocial abuse that guarantees a complete disenfranchisement and disconnection from society itself.

Recommended Reading and Listening

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